Here we will show you the basics of a happy marriage. Many times we get carried away by what movies and TV shows tell us and hope for a perfection that does not exist. This has caused countless divorces, however, God gives us the tools to avoid it, in a moment we will know them.
Basics of a happy marriage
God has not promised us that we will never have to struggle in marriage , but we can do better with His help. These keys are not the only tools you have to support your marriage. But they will serve as a good introduction to help you on your way to a truly enjoyable and happy marriage:
1. Respect and Acceptance
In essence, respecting your spouse is valuing and holding him or her in high regard. This means validating their opinions, even when they go against yours. Ephesians 5:33 says, “Each of you love your wife as yourself, and the wife respect her husband.”
To love your spouse as you love yourself is to value both their feelings and their opinions in the same way that you value yours. (And we all value our own feelings and opinions.) Don’t ignore what they share with you.
Don’t get frustrated or angry if he does or says something that you don’t like; be patient and listen.
Many of us try to conform our spouses to our image because we forget that they were made in the image of God and are meant to be conformed to the image of Christ.
We forget that we are made and destined to complement each other rather than duplicate ourselves.
If we were identical, we would not grow much. God unites opposites, or two unique individuals together, so that both can become a more complete person than they would be on their own.
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It may seem counterintuitive to many people, but being happy in marriage requires taking our focus off ourselves. When you are selfless and focus on meeting your spouse’s needs rather than striving for what you want, you will often find that your spouse is more than willing to reciprocate.
Proverbs 11:25 says, “He who brings blessing will be made rich, and he who waters will himself be watered.”
Support takes many forms .
The simplest and often most necessary form of support is encouragement and verbal affirmation. This goes back to respect. If you value your spouse, you will value their hopes, dreams, trust, and sense of security. You will put their needs before yours. Philippians 2: 3 says:
Don’t do anything out of selfish ambition or conceit, but humbly consider others more important than yourself.
Free yourself from pornography . Pornography can be found anywhere you choose to look for it: on the Internet, on cable channels, in a magazine, or in the wild of your imagination. If this factor has become a part of your life to some degree and in any way, it must be eradicated.
If you have to disconnect your internet and cable service due to lack of self-control or you need to avoid stopping at places that sell pornographic material, do it! Many times you must be able to fight against yourself to get rid of what is hurting your marriage and your relationship with God.
When we talk about estimating your marriage, we are really leading you to love your wife. You cannot, with integrity, say that you value your marriage very much and at the same time disrespect or mistreat your life partner. It is not enough to say “I appreciate my wife”; you must prove it. Let us give you some examples of things you should never do if you want to put your actions behind your words:
- Never, under any circumstances, should you physically abuse your spouse.
- You should not emotionally abuse your life partner.
- Never verbally abuse the woman or man who shares with you.
He first tells us that we should love our wives. Although this word is not common in everyday conversations, we can put it into practice if we consider our companions and take care of them with love. By loving our wives, we will see them as precious jewels and, in turn, act with compassion and sensitivity towards them.
Marriage exemplifies many unique and wonderful attributes. A godly marriage can exhibit unity, endurance, fulfillment, joy, and happiness. It can provide security, promise, and a sense of belonging.
And most importantly, it exemplifies God’s blessing. Your Creator wishes to bless your institution: marriage. He wants to use your marriage union to show His perfection and wisdom in creating men and women as distinct beings for ordered purposes.
Empathy is the sixth of the fundamentals of a happy marriage. This requires that thought and consideration take place before action.
Before acting on impulse, it is necessary to consider the feelings of our spouse. It is important that you ask yourself the following questions:
- How would my spouse feel if he found out that I did this?
- Would this action be healthy or beneficial for my spouse and my marriage?
Think about how many flirtations, bad decisions and bad investments would be avoided if we took the time to think about what our wives or husbands would feel.
There are times when the attack we feel is supernatural. But how do we recognize when it comes to Satan or a mere dispute with our spouse? This is where lighting is essential. False beliefs often cloud our thoughts. They can come as strong suggestions, such as: “You really are not satisfied in this relationship”, “Your spouse is just not there for you”, among others.
How many men and women begin their path of sin with the slow burning of discontent? From there, we are more than happy to fuel the flame while accepting the devil’s whispers of “something better” or his equally seductive lies about not being “good enough” for a healthy and full life.
So whether our ego is inflated or our self-esteem is trampled on, we are prepared for the power of Satan to influence us.
So, we must not get carried away by those contradictory voices; It is necessary to turn to God who is the one who has the true solution to our problem.
While women like intimacy to be nurtured throughout the day with small signs of affection and close connections in conversation and association, men are less reliant on accumulating affection.
They see their wives looking good, and they’re happy with it and ready for action!
Saying “I want to! Or I like you! ” It is not the best strategy for your wife to think about being intimate with you. Therefore, sexual limits or courtesies are essential. You may know them, but let’s explore a bit:
- Never demand or try to force your wife to do something sexual that she is uncomfortable with.
- Do not allow anything unnatural to enter the intimate realm of your life.
- Show your wife considerate and loving actions along with tender expressions of your love for her intimacy. You will find that she will also enjoy this moment, and consequently, you will have a greater reward from her on the spot.
- If you want romance to prevail, don’t be beastly.
- Keep your sex life private. Many times the opinions of others can spoil everything.
A strong marriage, a lasting marriage, is a great legacy for your children. When they see the quality of perseverance in their parents’ relationship, they understand that they too can persevere through the trials of life. They quickly see how kindness, compassion, and grace are healthy responses that enable husbands, wives, and families to overcome misunderstandings, disagreements, and character flaws.
What happens when we examine ourselves? Well, the first thing that happens is that we begin to take responsibility for our own actions. The process of taking responsibility opens us to repentance, change, and spiritual growth.
As regret occurs, we free ourselves from bad attitudes, bad habits, and fears. This causes spiritual growth, which brings God’s blessing into our lives and, subsequently, to our marriages.
The essentials of self-examination cannot be ignored. Therefore, do not give helpful suggestions to your spouse; Instead, pray and ask God to place in you the things that are pleasing to his eyes. Then step back and prepare to be blessed in extraordinary ways!
Marriage is never going to thrive in a self-centered environment . It is impossible for it to prosper without mutual respect and support.
But when you build your union on biblical foundations and apply these foundations of a happy marriage, you will discover that it is possible to have a pleasant union. The simple formula is to love your spouse more than yourself. Respect it, support it and listen to it. And then enjoy a new married life!