Marital delay is a situation where someone of a marriageable age is unable to get someone to marry.
These has become the challenge of Over 50-60% of youth in the society today.
God give speed but are we on the positioned for it? ,“And he said, O LORD God of my master Abraham, I pray thee; send me good speed this day… And he said unto them; Hinder me not, seeing the LORD hath prospered my way…” Genesis 24:12
There are various reasons that could be responsible for delay in marriage.
Some of these reasons listed below:
Reasons for Marital Delay
1. Negative Influence: friendships dictate has become one of the major point of marital delay.
So many people live there lives on the dictate of friends, family members and even the society where they live. Some, as a result of bad influences, believed you must marry a man with car or from affluence background or a particular tribe.
Others believed that the place of height, complexion, nativity, church affiliation as so on should be the basis of marriage. I overheard a lady lamenting that they are responsible for the delay in their sister’s life because they refused to receive the first person she brought as a fiancé.
But the truth is that she is responsible for the decisions of her life. Unfortunately the said sisters are enjoying their own matrimonial homes.
2. Unforgiveness: unforgiveness makes the favour of God to be far away from a child of God. And the bible made it clear in proverb 18:22 that it takes the favour of God to be married.
“Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth
favour of the Lord.” Proverbs 18:22.
Some as a result of pains and broken heart suffered from past relationships have vowed not to let go the hurt.
It is of a fact that we may have justifiable reasons for not forgiven.
But are those reasons enough to shut ourselves away from the mercy of God?
The muds that stain us are not the ones we throw away but the ones we refused to clean from our hands.
The more you hold on to the past the longer you postpone your day of joy.
It might not be easy, but you must let go the hurt and the pain of the past. Make up your mind that your former partner won’t meet you in the same situation he or she has left you.
And the best way to achieve that is to forgive and let go of the past.
3. Discouragement: As a result of heartbreak and past pains some people have given up on the desire to marry. You hear some people saying that is it really compulsory to marry? They believe that marriage is an avoidable stress.
We cannot improve on God, He said that it is not good for a man (and of course for a woman) to be alone.
” And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him”__ Genesis 2:18.
Any statement contradicting the opinion of God on the issues of life is nothing but foolishness.
4. Sin: Living in sin slows down a child of God in the pursuit of his destiny. Hebrew 12: 1 talks of the weight and sin which doth easily beset. In verse 15-16, it mentioned such sin as bitterness, fornication, profanity etc.
Some Godly marital relationships have been broken as a result of sexual immorality indulged by the parties involve.
Immorality has a way of slowing you down, The solution to this is genuine repentance.
5. Bad Character: So many single have used negative character such as uncontrollable anger, backbiting, jealousy, stubbornness, hatred, fighting, self-will and many others to drive away their Would-be-spouse.
No matter how beautiful and educated you are, nobody may be willing to put up with your negative character.
_,“It is better to dwell in the corner of a housetop, than with a
brawling woman in a wide house.” **Proverbs 21:9*”
This statement in proverbs is also applicable to man. A good character is a necessary requisite any man or woman will want to look at before saying yes.
6. Inferiority Complex: Inferiority Complex is a feeling of inadequacy or a mindset that one is not amounting to much.
It is inability to appreciate and accept who we are, the truth is that there is nobody that God has created useless. Every one of us has something within us that others need no matter how educated or brilliant they may be.
The cure to inferiority complex is self acceptance. Appreciate who you are, your height (either short or tall), your colour, your tribe and language, your size (either slim or fat), and your look. You may work on certain part of your body if you can but don’t ever condemn yourself.
7. Spiritual Oppression: Some people’s situations are oppression of the devil. So many people have talked of having some negative spiritual experiences in their lives. Some are consistently experiencing demonic attacks, unexplainable hatred for their spouse and so on.
The solution to this, among other things, is to lay hold on the word of God and claim your right in Christ.
You might need to read books that expose you to your right in Christ and how to wage biblical spiritual warfare. The bible says, “Resist the devil and he will flee from you.” Jas 4:7__
I pray for you that the Lord will help you. Your marital life will succeed. There will no longer be delays in your marital journey. You are blessed!
But remember, you must be genuinely surrender to Jesus Christ before your prayers can be answered.